The tiny home mistakes that niggle me – sometimes it's better not to look too closely for those imperfections because once they're on your radar you can't unsee them
There'll always be something that we want to change, fix, or improve in our homes
Strategist and content creator Francesca Swan is one of Ideal Home's new Open House contributors, sharing her thoughts on the concept of 'Everything' and what makes a home special to you. See the rest of her articles here.
Imagine the scene if you will. I walk into my bathroom first thing on a lovely morning – light streams through the big picture window, and I’m instantly bathed by the strong, warm and energising sunshine.
I’m immersed in a feeling of pure Everything – I feel present, content, alive, and maybe most importantly at 7am, awake. I look around and take joy in how I much love this bathroom.
Then I see it. The big Paul Klee vintage exhibition print that's been faded into a bleached, unrecognisable mess by said beautiful sun.
And then I step into the shower and notice the ever-so-slight ginger tinge of my hair dye, clinging to the pristine white tiles. And just like that, my Everything feeling flutters away, interrupted by a mild, yet familiar irritation.
Day after day, week after week, and two years later these small things still niggle me.
Like the annoyingly persistent sales call that always seems to happen, regular as clockwork, at the most irritating moment possible, just when you've finally relaxed for the day.
The big and irreversible
Unfortunately, there are many versions of these pesky niggles.
Some are big. We have clerestory windows in our summerhouse, which are not aligned to the roof lights. It’s subtle, but once you see it, it throws the whole room out and you can’t unsee it.
I'm still livid I didn’t notice it at the design stage, when it could easily have been changed to swerve the problem completely. I've had to make my peace with it. I can’t do anything about it now and there’s no use in self-flagellating forever. Chalk it up to renovation-brain overload and move on.
Nevertheless, a hard-earned lesson to lock in for the future.
The styling mishaps
Styling decisions that don’t work are another frequent bugbear.
The picture that just doesn’t look quite right. The rug you still don’t love. The coffee table that never quite felt like the one. Even though they are irksome, these are different. With a subtle shift in mindset, they can be quite fun.
Ultimately, finding those Everything pieces to complete a space takes time. If something doesn’t create that instinctive joy, we shouldn't torture ourselves over it. It’s more a case of recognising what you don’t like about the item in question and what you need to get right next time.
Then enjoy the process of browsing, stalking and waiting until the perfect piece comes along. You’ll know when it does.
So maybe these aren’t mistakes at all. Just part of the process.
All those small irritations
Then there are the small things that drive you mad, which come in too many forms to even begin to list.
Take my old office and its beautiful green and clear Murano glass chandelier, with encased lights that I accidentally ordered with cold bulbs. The wrong white on the walls made a bad situation worse.
With the flick of a switch, this lovely room transformed into a stark and flat space, creating an atmosphere not dissimilar to a cell in Guantanamo Bay. That’s what my imagination tells me anyway. Obviously, I don’t have first-hand experience to prove otherwise, which I hope I didn’t need to clarify!
With a lot of hassle, potential breakages and the help of a professional, I could have changed them, but I never got around to it. I just moaned about it endlessly.
That said, I am now meticulous about Kelvin ratings and making sure I choose the right bulbs to avoid another disaster – a constant headache and low-level anxiety of being water-boarded.
I’m sure I’m also not alone in having lost several lovely cushions to the colour-fading destruction of the sun. Now, it’s blinds down or strategic placement to protect my favourites.
Not to mention those tricky high-maintenance spaces – white bathrooms being a prime culprit. Without a proper, regular deep-cleaning schedule, (guilty as charged - again I blame renovation-brain), they quickly become stained and spoilt. Thankfully, a regrout and deep clean later and the shower is back to it’s original glory, and we are now obsessive about cleaning frequently and rigorously. Especially after a DIY root-touch up (mine, not his).
Then there are the everyday accidents – candle wax, red wine spills on velvet sofas – things that, in theory, can be sorted with a bit of research and careful attention. But, in truth, it’s a bit of a ballache, so you don’t.
So, every day, there it is…quietly annoying you and probably getting more difficult to repair as time goes on.
However, quite often the very real and very valid blocker is the worry of getting it wrong and making it worse. That’s certainly true in my case. At that point, it becomes a judgement call. Can you live with it, or does it actually need sorting out? If so, then it’s time to get stuck into finding solutions – or concede defeat and let common sense prevail by calling in the experts.
In the case of the aforementioned red wine stain on the velvet sofa – mine, in case you hadn’t guessed – I shudder thinking about the inevitable mess I would make let loose with a home remedy. For me at least, that’s one best left to the professionals. Whatever your gremlin, they fall into one of two categories: things you could fix and maybe one day you'll get around to it. Or you won’t, and that’s fine too.
Then there’s the things you can't fix. These you just must let go and make the best of a bad situation. Strategic styling and colour can go a long way to divert the eye.
A big part of the frustration is knowing that we could have stopped it happening in the first place. Prevention is always better than the cure.
So most importantly, how do you stop it happening again? Simple. Live it, learn it, don't do it again. Note to self – do not allow tipsy people bearing liquid near velvet.
Why we tolerate them
So, as sensible and capable people, why do we allow these things to sit there driving us mad?
Firstly, and most importantly, we can't do everything all at once. Sadly, we are not superheroes. We all have common constraints of time, money, and priorities – in both our home and our life – that affect when and how we deal with different things.
We can only do what we can. Setting ourselves ridiculous to-do lists that consume our weekends isn’t healthy or often, productive.
Secondly, being completely frank, I think that secretly, we all like an excuse for a good moan. It might be my ADHD – I very much say what I think (obviously within reason and appropriate to the situation!) – and I have a very real frustration and fixation about the small things that could have been avoided and can be fixed yet aren’t.
I rant about them frequently and passionately. Honestly, in a slightly weird masochistic way, I quite enjoy it. The unfortunate people in ear shot of my eternal and repetitive tirades on said annoyances don’t, so that’s probably something I need to work on. But hey, no one is perfect.
Maybe the other reason we tolerate them is because, unconsciously, we recognise that perfection isn't possible. We are all constantly spoon-fed images of interior perfection – beautiful and inspiring, yes. But also, the source of often unrealistic expectations which cause us to heap pressure on ourselves in pursuit of a flawless dream home. In the real world, it’s just not achievable.
Nevertheless, there will always be something that we want to change, fix, or improve in our home.
Perhaps these small things also exist as part of the universe’s grand scheme to give us something to chew on and stop us from pulling at bigger, more expensive threads that probably don't need to be pulled in the first place at all?
On the other hand, these things could also exist to make us truly appreciate the things that ARE right. OK, there may be a few small things that need work, but, in the grand scheme of things, we're likely pretty happy with everything else that is lovely.
We have all worked hard on our homes and should be basking in that satisfaction. Taking joy from our creations and enjoying that Everything feeling – happiness and contentment with what we have and where we live. Sometimes it's better not to look too closely for those imperfections. Because once you see them, you cannot unsee them. The person who first said “ignorance is bliss” knew what they were talking about.
And if you have let a niggle become a point of frequent and serenity-shattering obsession, maybe just try to let it slide and avert your eyes? One day you might get around to fixing it. Or you might not. But, in the grand scheme of things, does it really matter?
The big payoff
All that said, the payoff when you do fix something is pure satisfaction and a space that feels just right to you. A bothersome flaw gone forever.
The sun-drenched bathroom and ruined print? I’ve been trying without success to source a copy.
The bathroom will look SO much better with that print. Exactly as it was intended with a big, bold splash of colour against the white and dappled green marble, adding the perfect balance of vibrancy and texture.
One day I will find it, get it done properly and be very satisfied and happy, looking at it safely encased in UV resistant glass.
Until then, I’ll try to look the other way and concentrate on the things that are already Everything. Wish me luck.
