I learnt to live with less after my MS diagnosis – these are the 4 changes that have helped me live well

Amanda Jones is one of Ideal Home's new Open House contributors, sharing her thoughts on sustainable living and decorating a home in way that is good for the environment. See the rest of her articles here.

I live with Multiple Sclerosis (MS), an auto immune disease which is progressive, and incurable. I always chose to say, ‘live with’, rather than ‘suffer from’, a mindset decision I made very early on, after diagnosis. MS affects the brain and the spinal cord, literally any part of your body can be affected, making the disease unpredictable. Over the years, I’ve learnt to see my MS as a mentor and guide, showing me what to prioritise, advising me on how best to live my life.

I remember clearly the day my body told me to slow down. It is literally etched on my brain, (there will be a corresponding scar to mark the occasion). It was the school holidays, and I had taken a day off work to look after our two young daughters. I was walking out of my kitchen when my body stopped. I could not move the right side of my body. Slumping into a nearby chair, I didn’t panic. I secretly knew I had MS, but hadn’t allowed myself to acknowledge it, until now.

I knew because six years earlier, after giving birth, I had gone blind. The consultant examining me mentioned MS, and gave me a list of symptoms, all of which I had. I told the doctor, I didn’t have any of the symptoms, eager to get back home to my newborn. I was too busy to be ill, so swept everything under the carpet, and got on with life. My eyesight returned, and I got on with being a mother, wife, daughter, and career woman.

Gradually, over the course of that afternoon, my arm and leg began to function again, but instead of having time off work, I returned the next day, masking my difficulties, as best I could. I’m writing this, to give you an insight into how little I valued my health back then. I had just taken on a new project at work and was loving the challenge. I had two young children, and caring for my mum, who had Alzheimer’s. I was literally fuelled on adrenaline and stress. Maybe this was the only way my body could get me to slow down?

When I look back, I hardly recognise myself. Since my diagnosis I have worked hard, to simplify those things in my life, that I can. To work on my health, my routines, my home. There’s still lots of complexities in my life that I can’t change. However, there’s a lot I have been able to change, to achieve a better balance in my life. I think there are so many of you out there wanting to do the same, and the good news is, you don’t need a live changing condition to do it.

Listening to my body

I’ve learnt to really tune in and listen to my body, to prioritise physical rest, to maintain my equilibrium. To do this, I had to decide to say no to my very stressful career. Initially that was very difficult, financially, but also because my identity was very closely linked to my career.

I now have a real deep appreciation for my body, I no longer treat it carelessly. I’ve learnt to accept when it won’t do as I ask, and really love those times, when it does. It’s not until you can no longer go for that long walk, that you understand how much you took your legs for granted.

Since finishing work, I have regularly challenged myself with personal goals, all of which have been life enhancing and beneficial. I still however struggle with mental rest. I have a very busy mind, but I am putting better habits in place, to aid sleep and mindfulness, its still a work in process.

Less is more

For several years I lived as a minimalist. This was liberating for me. We carry so much ‘stuff’ around with us through life, and this stuff does have a physical and mental impact on us, whether we recognise it or not.

When I lived with less, I gained a freedom I never realised I needed, a ‘lightness’ that’s hard to describe. Through this process I learnt what was truly important to me. I’m now much more selective about what I add into my life, my home and my mind. In recent years, I’ve intentionally added a little more into my home, but it’s been done carefully and considerately, not impulsively and rashly, like I would have before. I’m mindful of my home, and how it aids my health, physically and mentally.

Goodbye multitasking

I always say I’m ‘time rich, but energy poor.’ My body moves slowly, and it can take me much, much longer to complete tasks. I’ve had to work through a lot of frustration during this adjustment. I now accept that slower pace, and focus on the task in hand, almost like a meditation.

I try wherever possible not to multitask, which I had always wore as some kind of medal before. I keep to simple, time efficient routines, simplicity is key. I have a gentle rhythm to my day, which supports my wellbeing. I can no longer rush, and that (most of the time), is a blessing.

Learning frugality

I have always been good at budgeting, but when I gave up work, I really understood what frugality meant. We live on much less that we did before, so I’ve had to learn new skills at making every penny stretch. We have a budget, and we stick to it. No impulse buys, no unused subscriptions. I’ve realised how much we had wasted over the years, but living this way means we can still live well, for a lot less than we did before. It’s just our ‘well’ may look very different to yours.

I may no longer be able to walk for miles in the countryside like I did before, and I can’t work the hard, long hours I did, but I’ve learnt so much about life over the years, living with MS. I accept this slower pace of life and see the value in it. I’ve learnt that multi-tasking, isn’t good for me, (I’m not sure it’s good for anyone).

Through living with less, and being frugal, I’ve learnt I can not only just live, but live well, with a richness and rhythm I didn’t have before.